Then the other side comes in....
What if everything works out? What if N REALLY gives Olly to me? What if he is MINE and MINE alone?
A few things come to mind....
What if everything works out? What if N REALLY gives Olly to me? What if he is MINE and MINE alone?
A few things come to mind....
- Guilt.... for taking Olly from his father; someone who loves him so much and wants the best for him....
- Relief.... that I don't have to wonder each time I drop O off if this will be the last time I ever see him
- Stress.... trying to pay rent (bc my rents wont let me live with them long term if I have Olly), handle school, make money (somehow) and still be able to afford dog food, vet bills, and grooming.
- Fear... that N and I will never talk if I am Olly's sole owner.... that N will resent me for taking his son... that N will regret this one day and want Olly back
I'm just afraid of making the wrong decision.
I want the best for this little guy...
I want the best for this little guy...
but I want him. I love him more than I ever thought I would. He makes horrible days better. I love how he freaks out when I come home. I love how he wants to sleep right up next to me no matter how big or small the bed is. I love how he follows me around. I love how he cries when he cant find me. I love his little face. I just love having him with me...
...but what If I'm thinking about ME too much? What if I'm being selfish? What then?...
I'd do whatever you can to keep Olly. He is your baby. Where there is a will, there is a way.
ReplyDeleteI am sure that everything will work out just fine:) If N wants to give you Olly, then take him and run!!:)
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