Tuesday, November 29, 2011


Just to clarify- conversation with Blake was through text, not a phone call.

I dont know why I responded

but I did.

I can't undo it.

Sunday, November 27, 2011

After 8 months...

Blake contacted me today.

  (if you dont know who Blake is, check back at January-April 2010 and beyond)





To tell me he rushed into his marriage and that it wasnt the right thing to do.

What am I supposed to say to that?

What am I supposed to say when he tells me he thinks about me every day?

What am I supposed to say when he says he's finally getting his PhD at VCU?

What am I supposed to say when I think about the pain his wife would feel if she knew he had contacted me after being married for over a year.

What am I supposed to say when he tells me he's sorry for everything he put me through?

What am I supposed to say when he tells me he wishes he had given "us" more time.

What am I supposed to say when he tells me he doesn't know what to do.

I told him to pray.

He told me he doesnt pray anymore.

I told him he should start.

After 8 months.

Monday, November 21, 2011

Oh My Goodness

WTH happened to November?

Its seriously time to start Christmas shopping and wrapping presents and craziness like that.

I am MIA.

I know.

Doubt anyone misses me so Im just gonna continue whatever it is Im doing.

Friday, November 11, 2011


A huge thank you for all the men and women who are, have, or ever will serve our country so selflessly.  I will never be able to thank you enough.

And yes, Mr. GAP, I am talking to you. Thank you- from the bottom of my heart. <3

Wednesday, November 9, 2011


Half Marathon was excruciating.  I knew by mile 3 that this was gonna hurt- bad!  It was definitely not my best day running but I sucked it up and finished it in 2 hours and 10 minutes (6 minutes slower than my last one).  Although I wanted to do better, the course was hard and I was not feeling it.  I'll take it!

Saturday, November 5, 2011

ch ch ch changes

I feel like the past month has just been filled with lots of changes.

I decided about 5 months ago that I was going to start moving towards my dream to start my own nannying agency to match families and nannies here in my town.

Then I added a family to my nannying schedule.

Then I found out that I was losing a family who will be moving in January.

Then I was asked to add in a brand new baby girl starting in December.

My dream for the agency has been postponed due to the craziness of the end of the year.  I have no clue how I would cover all the necessary aspects of the launch (insurance, clients, nannies) during the holidays while also trying to transition with my "kids" and helping my main family prepare to move.  Not to mention that Im going to be a wreck when they leave.

Maybe trucking forward would be better because then maybe my mind would be occupied enough for my heart not to hurt as much?

I dont know.

All I know is that there are changes coming at me from every which way