The Right Thing

I know I did the right thing ending things with boy.... so what I want to know is...

why the heck do I feel so crappy?

I did everything I could do to keep my mind off the fact that I was supposed to be in Ohio this past weekend with him (yes, I told him I would not go).   I went out on the boat with some friends on Thursday, took one of my "littles" that I babysit for on a "Date" to the Children's Museum on Friday before babysitting that night and then headed straight over to another family's house to start an 7 day long overnight job 2 days early.

What else am I supposed to do?


I cant make myself any busier than I am.

It doesnt matter that I felt like God was telling me boy wasnt the one.  What matter rights now is that I know I hurt him (even though he understood) and I have no idea what the past week has been for him.  For all I know, he's been fine but it still makes me feel guilty that he could be still upset with me.


Im rambling, I know.


But how do you keep walking away from something like this when you feel so bad about it?!


Do not get confused.  I will not be contacting him nor getting back with him because God made His intended path very clear to me but Im just thinking outloud right now. 

These thoughts are raw.

So dont judge me.