I.
Am.
SO.
Over.
It.
N has now come back and tried to apologize and profess his love for me. Saying he really wants to give us another chance.
R U KIDDING ME?
You just FLIPPED out on me and told me you never wanted to see me again!
I dont feel good even considering giving him another chance.
His "Im sorry's" dont mean anything to me anymore and Ive made that very clear.
Our relationship was so hard on me and I never realized it until I was on the outside looking back.
I dont want to do that again.
EVER.
I have a problem with not wanting to hurt people so this is really hard for me.
I KNOW I dont want to marry N.
SO WHY AM I HESITATING TELLING HIM TO HIT THE ROAD?
I dont want to hurt him.
and I dont want to give up Olly.
Dont get me wrong. I have been VERY honest about how I dont feel that us being together is a good thing
but
I have also allowed myself to hang out with N and all our mutual friends a few times over the past month or so. I made the mistake of believing that he would believe the words coming out of my mouth when I said over and over that "We are not getting back together."
Clearly he isnt hearing me... or isnt believing me... or something.
I DONT KNOW.
AHHHHH!!
I know I should just break all communication and just accept that he is most likely going to keep Olly from me.
but Im being selfish and I dont want to give up Olly.
or hurt anyone.
Help me out here.
Still here, still reading, and still praying for you. I know it is easy for me to say from the outside, but don't put yourself in the position to be abused and hurt by him. I know you love Olly, but nothing is worth being treated the way he treats you and honestly it doesn't sound like those mutual friends are all that great either. Again, that is just me on the outside looking in. I pray God reveals to your heart how He needs you to move in this situation.
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