Oh Lord, help me

I need a vacation. Maybe a permanent relocation.

Here's life.

• Went to see Jason Aldean/Brooks & Dunn in Charlotte on Friday night. Show was amazing- traffic was awful - it poured on us - I hate drunk people - and the drama of trying to merge two groups of friends at one function is definitely NOT worth it.
• I'm still stressed even though I'm graduated. That cant be normal.
  
• My good friend, Brad, decided to tell me he wants to be with me yesterday and got mad when I said I didn't feel the same way. He said that I am pathetic for loving someone who is engaged to someone else and that I live in a fantasy world. Seriously? Last time I checked, you don't get to choose who you love and you also cant control what other people do. I'm grieving Blake but I'm not letting my life pass me by because of what happened. I am living like there is no tomorrow... I just miss Blake while I'm doing it. Brad told me he doesn't want to see or speak to me ever again. Cheers to good friends....
  
• I deactivated my fac.ebo.ok account. I just cant handle it anymore. No, Blake does not have a fb, but everyone else does. Its been a huge weight lifted off of my shoulders even though I thought it'd be stressful. It was supposed to be temporary but I think it's going to be permanent.
• I go in on Wednesday for my FINAL POINT CONSULTATION for the Sonography Program- This is the last step before finding out whether I got into the program or not. I thought Id be freaking out...but Im not. I dont have the energy to freak out.
• My friend is going into the PeaceCorp in July and although I am really proud of her, I am really worried about her too. I am hanging out with her after work tonight.
  
• N asked me to meet up with him last time I was home, I agreed and was then bailed out on twice. He "had to work late" one night and "forgot that I was leaving town" the second time. I told him that I cant play this game anymore and that I will not be contacting him again. I haven't heard anything from him. I think its safe to say I will never see Ollydog again.
  
• I am going to travel the East Coast in an RV with a family that I babysit for from June 27th-July 10. Their kids are 6 yrs (girl), 4 years (boy), 2 years (boy), and 3 months (girl) so it'll be interesting, I'm sure! I feel like this is what I need right now- Hop in an RV and turn off my phone for two weeks and just travel... for free for that matter... and with a paycheck at the end....I couldn't really pass up the offer. Any ideas on "family friendly" places to stop?? We're starting in North Carolina and heading up.
  
• I have been planning to go to church all week (I'm at my apartment at school this week working) because I know I need the fellowship and I'm pretty sure this is the weekend Blake is in Vegas for his friend's Bachelor Party (That way I wouldn't have to worry that he'd be there). I got up and got completely ready and then didn't go. I'm too worried I'm wrong about the dates and I'll see B. Right now, I cant handle that.
• I know Ive been really MIA lately and I'm sorry. I'm seriously just trying to get my bearing again. I have been still reading your blogs even though I'm not commenting. I have a lot of things I want to talk about so I'm gonna work on those posts over the next week or so.

Meanwhile, Lord Jesus, Help me.